IT'S TIME TO "FAP FAP FAP"
ATTACK YOUR "FUN BAGS"
LET'S START WITH YOUR "BAGS"
THAT'S RIGHT! GRAB YOUR "BAGS"
IT'S TIME TO "FAP FAP FAP"
ATTACK YOUR "FUN BAGS"
HOLD UP YOUR "FLAG"
DON'T YOU FORGET
YOU CAN WAVE IT IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT
LET'S WAVE OUR "FLAGS"
WAVE! WAVE! WAVE!
LET'S WAVE OUR "FLAGS"
TAKE OUT YOUR "LIGHT STICK"
IT'S TWO OF A KIND (LOLWUT?)
IT'S "INTERACTIVE"
MEANS YOU CAN "JOIN"
JUST PRETEND
OH! OH! OH! IT'S A "DICK" OOOH!
YOU KNOW THAT YOU WANT TO
AND YOU KNOW THAT YOU NEED TO
YOU WANT TO WET
WET A TISSUE
I PISS "NEWATER"
AND YOU WANT TO DRINK
YOU AND ME LET'S SHARE A BIT
I WANT YOUR "BISCUIT"
AND YOU WANT MY "SWEET"
YOU AND ME LET'S SHARE THIS "TREAT"
WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAH
TIME FOR THE "FUN BAGS" SONG
WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAH
WE LIKE THE "FUN BAGS" SONG
LET'S START WITH YOUR "BAGS"
THAT'S RIGHT! GRAB YOUR "BAGS"
IT'S TIME TO "FAP FAP FAP"
ATTACK YOUR "FUN BAGS"
I PISS "NEWATER"
AND YOU WANT TO DRINK
YOU AND ME LET'S SHARE A BIT
I WANT YOUR "BISCUIT"
AND YOU WANT MY "SWEET"
YOU AND ME LET'S SHARE THIS "TREAT"
WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAH
TIME FOR THE "FUN BAGS" SONG
WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAH
WE LIKE THE "FUN BAGS" SONG
LET'S START WITH YOUR "BAGS"
THAT'S RIGHT! GRAB YOUR "BAGS"
IT'S TIME TO "FAP FAP FAP"
ATTACK YOUR "FUN BAGS"
Today I saw that our "Father of Singapore", Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles, has less Facebook "Likes" than Minister Mentor Lee Kwan Yew.
I had it up to here with this election bullshit.
I get it that people have different ideologies when it comes to government. If you think a political party will do better than other political parties, so be it. If you think a political party is too smug and needs to be pushed into harder work by knowing that their position is not a given, I cannot argue with you. You unhappy your whatever too expensive, OK fine.
But what I cannot stand is how the elections have shown how horribly ungrateful and thankless Singaporeans are.
No matter what a shitty job a political party is doing now, it remains that a lot of their members have dedicated a big part of their lives to building everything we have today.
It is thanks to them that we are "The Number 1 Most Uncorrupted Country In The WORLD" (with Denmark and New Zealand LOL). We have absurd safety around the island (with Mother Nature's help LOL). Our children are all ensured, at the very least, some education.
So no matter how unhappy you are now, what's with the snide remarks, the insults, the twisting of a political party's words into evil connotations, the yelling during their rallies? Really? Politicalpartysmear? Childish! Just go vote for a political party lah talk so much for what?
Alright enough ranting about a political party versus other political parties. Whatever. Let's agree to disagree.
I'm now talking about Minister Mentor Lee Kwan Yew VERSUS Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles.
Yes yes he dedicated his whole life to building Singapore to where it is today.
But why should he deserve more Facebook Likes than Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles? I know, Facebook "Likes" don't mean anything. But I'm just IRRATIONALLY annoyed. Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles dedicated his life to building Singapore to where it is today, and this is the thanks he gets from Singaporeans?
That they'd rather pledge loyalty to some political party who has done something for Singapore?
From back in 1817, 194 freaking years ago when he looked like this:
He has founded our country...
He drew up what is now known as the Jackson Plan, and replanned the city according to recommendations of a committee headed by the colony's engineer, Phillip Jackson, which was a segregated plan, giving the best land to the Europeans, yet it was considered remarkably scientific for the time. And even though we are a minute country with no natural resources, he transformed us to one of the most bustling hubs of trade and activity in the world.
Think Singapore is multiethnic? Thank him, he wrote a specific regulation in the constitution which called for the multiethnic population of Singapore to remain as it is, and there shall be no crimes based on being a race, or racial situations would have been even worse.
When Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles was faced with politics, he finally turned back to the natural sciences. He gave a speech regarding the opening of a Malay college in Singapore that heavily involved his observations of his years in Southeast Asia and the importance of both the local and the European languages. Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles personally gave $2000 towards the effort. It worked.
He caused Singaporeans to learn English, which we are now using to criticise EVERYONE's every move.
And throughout his longest tenure in Singapore of only 8 months, he was considered the founder of Singapore nevertheless.
Today he is THIS old man:
If you are so old and your wife died would you still care about your colony's welfare?!
AND YET HOW DO YOU GUYS REPAY HIM?
I don't care how you vote or how you feel towards the government.
But you cannot deny Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles of his contribution to Singapore - So please, SHOW SOME RESPECT.
How shameful and hurtful is it for him to see that Minister Mentor Lee Kwan Yew has more support from Singaporeans than him?
Thank you Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles. I am proud to be a Singaporean today because of you.
P/S: Who am I voting for? I DUNNO LOL. But if I were in the Aljunied GRC, I'd vote for any political party because I believe anyone can do an awesome job and will continue to do so. Losing any minister will be a loss to our nation. But you do whatever you want.
P/S: I will delete any comment I want with no rhyme or reason because I only want to see whatever I want to see LOL.
UPDATE: Yes I know Facebook Likes are stupid and Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles's page isn't even official. I know he probably doesn't care about Facebook Likes. BUT. I just BUAY GUM WAN leh!
Why the fucking Facebook Posts all showing off as if this is some kind of WIN for whatever? Fuck please it's not even in Minister Mentor Lee Kwan Yew's Wikipedia page like a trophy (because no one has edited it yet LOL). You know what is BUAY GUM WAN?! 不甘願! 不爽 Let him even have this little victory which he may or may not deserve.
And now Sir Thomas Stamford Bingley Raffles still has less Likes than him, as it should not be. I am disappoint folks!
...
(If you have not realised it by now, this is a parody of THIS. Problem?)
Easy hire, easy fire, that's the Life you make
Oh give, give, give it all but you never take
Should've known you was Trouble from the first Job
Had your Shoulders so free, why were they free?
Gave me all my Pay and I tossed away your Trash
I tossed away your Trash, I did
To give me all my Pay is all I ever asked
Cause what you don't understand is
I'd catch a Grenade for you
Throw my Hand on a Blade for you
I'd jump in front of a Train for you
I'm paid to do Anything for you
Ow Owww
I would go through all this Pain
Take a Bullet straight through my Brain
Yes I would die for you, Master
But you won't do the same
Owww Ow Ow Owww
Blue Black, Blue Black, Beat me til I'm numb
Tell my Boss I say, Hey, when you get back to where you're from
Rich Master, Spoilt Master, that's just what you are, Yeah
You'll smile in my Face as I clean the Windows of your Car
Gave me all my Pay and I tossed away your Trash
I tossed away your Trash, Yes I did
To give me all my Pay is all I ever asked
Cause what you don't understand is
I'd catch a Grenade for you
Throw my Hand on a Blade for you
I'd jump in front of a Train for you
I'm paid to do Anything for you
Ow Owww
I would go through all this Pain
Take a Bullet straight through my Brain
Yes I would die for you, Master
But you won't do the same
If my Body was on Fire
Oh you'd tell me I was so careless
You said you paid me, you're a Liar
Cause you never, ever, ever did, Master
But Master, I'd still catch a Grenade for you
Throw my Hand on a Blade for you
I'd jump in front of a Train for you
I'm paid to do Anything for you
Ow Owww
I would go through all this Pain
Take a Bullet straight through my Brain
Yes I would die for you, Master
But you won't do the same
No you won't do the same
You wouldn't do the same
Oh you never do the same
Owww Ow Ow Owww
...
"Grenade" (c) Bruno Mars
Photo (c) STOMP
Parody (c) Me (NeoVersion7)
This will officially be my LAST Blog Entry before I leave Everything I have to do my National Service...
If anything unpleasant happens to me... I will blame National Service. I do not care about what Professionals have to say. Not ALL Men were born to be Soldiers. They can tell you that you are Unique. They can tell you that you are Special. They can tell you that no one else on Earth can be like you. GET REAL!
Men doing National Service is no different from herding a bunch of Cows into a Burger Factory. Not all Cows can be equally fat or healthy. So let us put them through a Routine until they are all equally good enough to make decent Burgers out of them...
Soldiers are Products like those in the War Games that you see all the time. All it takes are Resources and Time to get the Results that you need...
I am not built to be a strong Man and I doubt I will ever become one. I will be pissed off if I ever feel pressured by complete Strangers to become Someone that I am not. Get the Hell off my Case...
I am probably being put at Risk now for even expressing my Opinions about this. Free Speech is a Lie. How the Hell does one even "abuse" Free Speech? It does not even begin to make Sense to me. You either have it or you do not...
The Moment that Someone tells you what you can or cannot say or Someone does Something to you because of Something that you said... It is not because you were abusing Free Speech. You simply DID NOT have ANY Free Speech at all and you were an Idiot for even thinking you had any...
...
To lighten up the Mood here before I bid Farewell to all of you... Here is one Final Collection of Bastardised "One Piece" Pages taken from the latest Manga Chapter. Enjoy... :)
NOTE: This is from a Manga. So read this from Right to Left. Top to Bottom. Savvy?...
My Thanks to Eiichiro Oda. Now I will have to do my National Service while wondering what the Hell the next Chapters will bring. I hope that I can find fellow NS Men who like One Piece too... Which is difficult since 90% of all Singaporeans who read Japanese Manga do not know about One Piece...
It is amazing about how underrated One Piece is when compared to Bleach and Naruto. Bleach is dragging on and on with their own Story and Naruto is beginning to be more like Star Wars. Both Bleach and Naruto Animes are experiencing a Storm of Fillers.
What about One Piece Anime? Oh Yes! Still doing Original Content! Oh God! It feels so good to rant about all of this at last! Disagree with me? The Chat Box is there. Feel free to blow your Mind...
Too bad that I will be too busy to read whatever that you have to say! LULZ!
And finally... A nice Video and Song from One Piece...
...
Dear Friends... Good Bye and Good Luck...
I will try to return to all of you as soon as possible. I am a Modern Man! Over and Out!
...
Signing Off...
Muhammad Yusri Bin Muhammad Yusof (Neo Version 7.0)
I do not like National Service. I am reluctant to do it. I am not going to enjoy a second of it. I still have to do it anyway. That is the price to pay to be born a Male in a small and vunerable country like Singapore.
I would rather be a Modern Man!
But just WHAT is a Modern Man? Let George Carlin describe one for you. In fact, he was one himself!
"I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond!
I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, ridin the wave, dodgin the bullet and pushin the envelope. I’m on-point, on-task, on-message and off drugs. I’ve got no need for coke and speed. I've got no urge to binge and purge. I’m in-the-moment, on-the-edge, over-the-top and under-the-radar. A high-concept, low-profile, medium-range ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb. A top-gun bottom feeder. I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps and run victory laps. I’m a totally ongoing big-foot, slam-dunk, rainmaker with a pro-active outreach. A raging workaholic. A working rageaholic. Out of rehab and in denial!
I’ve got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant and a personal agenda. You can’t shut me up. You can’t dumb me down because I’m tireless and I’m wireless, I’m an alpha male on beta-blockers.
I’m a non-believer and an over-achiever, laid-back but fashion-forward. Up-front, down-home, low-rent, high-maintenance. Super-sized, long-lasting, high-definition, fast-acting, oven-ready and built-to-last! I’m a hands-on, foot-loose, knee-jerk head case pretty maturely post-traumatic and I’ve got a love-child that sends me hate mail.
But, I’m feeling, I’m caring, I’m healing, I’m sharing-- a supportive, bonding, nurturing primary care-giver. My output is down, but my income is up. I took a short position on the long bond and my revenue stream has its own cash-flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds and I watch trash sports! I’m gender specific, capital intensive, user-friendly and lactose intolerant.
I like rough sex. I like tough love. I use the “F” word in my emails and the software on my hard-drive is hardcore--no soft porn.
I bought a microwave at a mini-mall; I bought a mini-van at a mega-store. I eat fast-food in the slow lane. I’m toll-free, bite-sized, ready-to-wear and I come in all sizes. A fully-equipped, factory-authorized, hospital-tested, clinically-proven, scientifically- formulated medical miracle. I’ve been pre-wash, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened, pre-approved, pre-packaged, post-dated, freeze-dried, double-wrapped, vacuum-packed and, I have an unlimited broadband capacity.
I’m a rude dude, but I’m the real deal. Lean and mean! Cocked, locked and ready-to-rock. Rough, tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow, I ride with the tide. I’ve got glide in my stride. Drivin and movin, sailin and spinin, jiving and groovin, wailin and winnin. I don’t snooze, so I don’t lose. I keep the pedal to the metal and the rubber on the road. I party hearty and lunch time is crunch time. I’m hangin in, there ain’t no doubt and I’m hangin tough, over and out!"
- George Carlin
...
If you meet any of the descriptions above, you are indeed a Modern Man! LULZ!
The end of August is here. The beginning of September is coming. Also, the Month of Ramadan...
Once again... The time has come for me to make several months of practice finally worth something! The time has come for me to endure another 30 Days of Fasting! ORA ORA ORA! WRYYYYYYYYY! LULZ!
On a religious note, I still remember how much I like this epic Movie:
Ever since I saw "The Ten Commandments" on television many years ago, I became interested in the life story of Moses.
It's funny how some of the people who actually have the courage to submit any kind of religious content online would also feel the need to disable Comments to prevent any kind of religious debates or arguments. LOL WUT?
Now... For something a little different...
George Carlin is a comedic Genius. Sure, he might have gone straight to Hell for all the religious stuff that he joked about while he was still alive... But he is still a comedic Genius. :)
YES! YOU READ THAT RIGHT! I actually joined a Social Networking Website! The irony of it all is that I'm never good at being social in any social environment! I still have no idea how Facebook works but I'm slowly figuring the place out. I've already made several Friend Requests and so far no one has rejected me yet. It sure is good to see all my past friends again. Many of them have changed so much. I'm sure they would never recognise me if they saw me. I'm sure they still remembered me as the small, skinny and disturbed excuse for a human being that studied in the same school as them... LULZ!
...
Seriously? Why would I do something like this? A Blog is already amazing enough yet I went further and made my presence in a Social Networking Website. This must definitely be The End... :O
Well, I do have a reason. I serious one. As much as I hate to post something serious in this Blog, I cannot avoid it this time. Read if you want. It does contain Serious Business...
...
It all started with a dream I had before the 20th of August. I still remember it clearly.
In this dream, I was all by myself in a dark corner. A few metres ahead, there was an outdoor party going on with decorations and loud music. I was surprised to see that everyone in that party is someone that I have known in my past. To be specific, they were EVERYONE that I have known during my time in Bukit View Primary School, Choa Chu Kang Primary School, Teck Whye Secondary School and Republic Polytechnic. Everyone there was making new friends and talking about all kinds of things. Everyone had fun.
Without me.
I was still in the dark corner while the Party was surrounded by many bright lampposts because it was evening. I could not speak and no one could see me. I also could not walk for some reason. I was stuck standing in the same spot and the party went on and on without me. I wanted to be with all my friends but I could not.
When I finally managed to move, I quickly ran towards the party. However, since it was held outdoors, the skies soon got darker and it started to rain heavily. Everyone else packed up their things really quickly and together they ran away from the rain...
And from me...
By the time I got there, my friends vanished from sight, literally. The lampposts were still shining brightly but I was the only person there. All I could hear was the sound of rain.
Then I woke up.
...
It was then I realised that I have made a grave mistake in my past by not keeping in touch with my past friends and all I had were photos to remind me of them. During my 1st Year in Republic Polytechnic, I did not like the idea of having Email or MSN because I thought they were a nuisance. I just use the email to fill out forms and I only check them when I have important mail to send or receive.
I was extremely fortunate to meet Saiful in RP. He's a friend who I've known for a very long time and seeing him again was a blessing to me. Eventually, I was convinced to start my own MSN Live Messenger Account and added as many contacts as possible.
Recently, I realised that MSN alone is not enough. Therefore, Facebook is my chance to go further and find more friends from my past. So far, IT WORKED! I'm receiving Confirmation Notifications every hour telling me that another friend has accepted my Requests.
Heck, I had to use a photo to show them that I exist. I would have put one of my Drawings as my Display Pic but I guess I'll do that once I have everyones' contacts. LOLZ!
Even my mother mentioned that she had many friends who she had to leave behind and since the Internet didn't exist in her time, I can understand the difference between my situation and hers.
Oh well. Not many people talk to me on MSN anyway! Facebook can tell me what my contacts are doing and that's good enough for me. I'm still too embarrassed to start a conversation with any of them unless I know them really well.
Anyway, I'm just glad that I'm still remembered by the people who I left behind. The worse thing for me to end up is a nobody...
...
WAIT A MINUTE! WHY FACEBOOK? THERE ARE OTHER WEBSITES LOLZ!
Well... Facebook is also the preferred place for YTMND.Com... Which has changed my life... :D
Another Aikido Session has come and gone. I have studied Aikido for over 3 years and I must stop soon in order to do my "National Service"... Sigh...
If I didn't have to skip a Grading in the past, I would have been a "Black Belt" by now. Also, I wouldn't have to fold a "Hakama" in order to earn it. Goddamn Aikido Syllabus! D:
